ACTRESS

Recently, I saw Robert Greene’s ACTRESS on the festival circuit, and I can’t stop thinking about it. I love the way Robert blurs lines of narrative and documentary - performance and authenticity. But in part, I loved the film because it feels like my life. The main subject, Brandy Burre, misses her kid’s birthday, while she is estranged from her husband and trying to break back into the acting business. Missing a birthday is bigger than missing a tooth (I missed my daughter losing her first recently) - but it’s all the same. A woman working at something - and missing moments, milestones, gone for good. What struck me most is how much she lingered on her transformation - the make-up and hair, preparing a face to meet the world vs. the face she had at home. Even though I’m not an actress and don’t have the time for such measured styling - I get it.  The film haunts me. Just like Brady, I often find I’m pretending and postering to make it through the day. Sorta mother. Sorta filmmaker. Sorta, sometimes wife.